Woke up with a headache, not a killer one that makes me wish life would just end and hide under the covers ... just an annoying one.
So, my cure was sugar, caffeine, sunshine and ... MY 5 YEAR OLD BEST FRIEND!!!
She is truly the 5 year old version of me (then and now). Spunky, quirky, HILARIOUS, takes absolutely no shit, talks as much as me (perhaps more, and those who know me in person, this is a tough feat) and god do I LOVE her. She is also the MIRACLE CURE for depression.
We went to a park where we:
- Paddle boated for an HOUR. Rather, I paddled, she dangled her feet off the back, laid around, and stuck her hands in the water, tried to find mermaids. SHE is one, a mermaid, but I can't be one, she hasn't told me THE secret .... yet ... she is considering telling me how, cross your fingers, i REALLY want to be a mermaid like her.
- Ate ice cream. Twice. Before and after boating, which provoked this: "Mom NEVER lets me eat ice cream twice! (wide eyes) - Then me: "See, I'm not your mom so I get to let you!" Followed by a very, very responsible talk about how I don't let MY son eat ice cream twice so don't be mad at your mommy for not letting you have ice cream twice, this is just a special friends thing blah blah blah... Because dude, i AM a mom and I would kill anyone who threw me under the bus like that when my son was 5!!
- Waded in the lake which was against the rules technically but the staff conveniently "looked the other way" bless them, while smilely broadly at our adorableness. Me with shoes on and her shoes off and then I carried her. I sure got my exercise in esp AFTER paddle boating for an hour - note to self - paddling BACK against the current is much harder than essentially drifting out with the current, yes I'm a brainiac. I carried her back to the bench to put on her sock and shoes with nice and clean rinsed feet at her request (aka insistence). Me, I don't care if I squish squish squish, those shoes are now known as "broken in".
- Played our (yes our) butts off at the playground where we were alone because it was 96 in the shade (which the playground is not and is ... metal mostly, neither is the lake in shade I should note). I narrated her running "American Ninja Warrior" for an hour which made her thrilled and made me giggle endlessly. She won Mt. Midoramiamo (sp) like, 5 times, each time winning more outrageous prizes such as a goat farm. And I got ever more creative in the "obstacles" such as playing chess, flying the Pacific, running a marathon and digging a hole. It was so fun.
- Then we got lost in the woods. For reals. But SHE led us out. (see above referenced me being a brainiac). I am truly hopeless. Somehow, I navigated 3 girlfriends at age 19 across pretty much entire continental Europe (Athens to Scotland) with only a backpack and a PAPER map for 6 weeks in 19(mumble mumble). Swear to god. But that hasn't happened since, thank goodness for iPhone maps.
Headache. What headache???? Depression? Never heard of it. And I sweat off 8 pounds.
And we have a date for next weekend. Same thing but grilling out lunch, kayaks and upright paddle boards. (I am a former lifeguard - no, I am not crazy!) . We want to get IN the water!!!! And trust me, me kayaking and paddle boarding WILL result in us very very wet!!!
Man, I am so freaking happy. It feels so good to be utterly and truly happy from the top of my hair to my toes. This the first PURE and total joy I've had since Chad died.
So, I guess it is true. Things do get better. It took one week shy of 5 months to feel pure joy again.
That was a really long 5 months.